Thursday, May 31, 2012

40 for fuck's sake


I'm 40 now.

I turned officially old and my internal teenager is completely horrified.

I had an awesome party with as many people who like or love me as could attend and said "Goodbye 39" in fine style.

I've thought about this post for a while and I still don't know what to say. It really sucked to be turning 40.

When I remove my infertility-smog-coloured glasses and look back at the past years I can see that lots of wonderful things happened, but with them on it's all tinted gray ... and the lustre, the shine of the awesome is dulled. I think I would be so much more grateful for my what-really-were-fantastic-30s had I not spent so much time and emotion chasing a futile dream.

C'est la vie.

I hope you are all well. I stalk around on the outskirts of your blogs occasionally, but mostly I'm completely swamped by life and my multiple roles. I'm loving placement and finding that providing intervention for little kids with ASD is incredibly rewarding. I'm winding up at work with a huge global survey that's killing me, but once it's collected I'm done there. And I'm slowly reading and getting my head around my PhD topic, which is also huge and doing my head in. My family are well; my darling Little Guy is no longer a baby, showing his abilities and his love in new ways every day. My step-children are growing up quickly into lovely young adults who delight me. Life moves so quickly. My Big Guy is, as always, completely wonderful and wonderfully devoted, a blessing in no disguise.



  1. wishing you the very happiest of birthdays. So much love and luck to you in the next decade of your life (and many, many more).
    So amazing about your grad school placement.
    always sending you love

  2. Well, happy birthday to you! And I hear 40 is the new 30, so do it all over bigger and better. :)

  3. Happy birthday! I am glad u are too busy too blog.

  4. A very happy birthday to you!


  5. Happy Birthday, Pundelina. You look wonderful, and welcome to your Carlsberg years! It's not so bad...really!

  6. A very happy birthday to you, Dear Pundy! Love the costume.

    Oh I hear you...I am facing this next year and it does NOT make me happy.

    Here's to another fabulous decade ahead of you. You are blessed with a wonderful husband and family, and loads of loved ones. So glad to hear you are finding your work rewarding. :)

    Thinking of you xoxo

  7. 40 is the new... something?

    I hope at least that such a big sounding number can at least help kickstart a new epoch with no grey bits :( I hope it's not insensitive to say that there were too many colours in my 20s so that on the day I turned 30 I felt like the whole lot of that decade looked muddy brown. I'm hoping for something cheerfuller this decade!

    Am glad you're still gunning the PhD and that work is working.

  8. Happy 40. (I am only a hair's breadth behind you). It's tough not to look back with glasses of all types. But I hope the next decade is a wonderful one for you.

    (So glad your work is going so betting you are making a huge difference to those kids).


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